I Skipped My Morning Practice–Here’s What Happened

This is something I haven’t done in…months. I truly can’t remember the last time. 

But it was the Thursday before launching my website the following week (eeeeek!) and I could use every single minute while my kids are sound asleep to get things done. So what did I do? I went to my morning meditation spot and…started working. I didn’t even realize what I was doing at first, my mind was already miles ahead of me deep into my to-do list. And while I was able to check a few things off–ultimately, skipping my morning practice was counterproductive. Here’s what happened. 

1. My stress levels were at a 10, all morning long. 

After waking up at 5am–I don’t think I took a full, deep breath until 10am. My mind was racing and I could feel my heart rate elevated. I felt…wired. And not in a productive way. In a jumpy, let’s try to control every little situation kind of way. My husband could feel it, my kids could feel it and overall, I wasn’t the calm and present version of myself that I aim to be.

But don’t take my word for it–My Oura ring says it all. While I forgot it on the charger when I went straight to work that morning (a result of my mind being on another planet), as soon as I put it on at 8am, my daytime stress level skyrocketed to “stressed” and pretty much stayed there for the next 2 hours until I paused for 2 minutes of breathwork, which we get into later.

Let me just say, being in a “stressed” state isn’t necessarily a bad thing–we need stress to get things done. The problem arises when we stay here for an extended period of time, not giving our bodies and nervous system a chance to recover.

So let’s take a look at the next day–I think it’s important to mention that my morning practices have been short as of late, focusing more on what needs to get done for the launch–this one was probably only 20 minutes total (10 minute meditation and 10 minutes journaling). Again, you can see my stress levels shoot up to “stressed” around 8am (good morning, kiddos!) but after 30 minutes, they come down to an “engaged” state. From here, I spent some time in a relaxed state before spending another 15 minutes “stressed” and finally, the rest of the day I was in an “engaged”, “relaxed” or “restored” state. Again, being “stressed” isn’t a bad thing–But you want to keep it short and (sweet?), allowing your body the chance to recover.

2. My appetite was…strange. 

I was hungry, literally all day. I’m an around the clock breastfeeding mama so sometimes, I have days like these and I honor them wholeheartedly. But the foods I was reaching for weren’t ones I would typically eat. Here’s the lineup–bone broth protein in my coffee, which is completely normal for me. But from here, I had a perfect bar (not what I would typically want to start my day with) and then a wrap with a piece of cheese on it(?) and some green juice–and from here, a piece of pizza and two eggs for lunch (I think this was all before 10am). Sounds like my first trimester diet (but I’m not pregnant!).

All of this to say, I notice a direct correlation in my meditation practice and how I fuel my body. A consistent practice is what helped me to release extra weight I had been carrying on and off throughout my entire life (for once and for all)–but this is a story for another time (spoiler: it had nothing to do with exercise and/or food restriction).

And finally, I just felt…off. 

I kind of already touched on this but the best way I can describe it is that I wasn’t seeing clearly. I felt scattered–like I was right smack dab in the middle of a brushy forest, having no idea which way to turn because every direction looked exactly the same, hazy.

BUT! The story doesn’t end there. In the past, I would have chalked it up as “better luck tomorrow.” But that’s not who I am anymore. So–As soon as my daughter went down for her morning nap, I took 2 minutes (literally 2 minutes) to sit and breath followed by 2 more minutes of stretching. These 4 minutes helped me come back to center and brought me from a “stressed” to a “relaxed” state as I dove back into my to-do list.

When my daughter woke up, we went for a walk and I played one of my favorite mantras on repeat. Movement combined with mantra playing in the background…chef’s kiss. 

Aaaaaand just like that, I was back! Inspiration started to hit and instead of continuing to beat myself up for missing my morning practice, I decided to use it as an experiment and to write about it. It was all for a purpose. 

So let me leave you with this–none of us are perfect, we are human. And there will be mornings or days where we fall off track, all totally normal (and call me crazy but also part of the fun). The point isn’t perfection. The point is how quickly we can get back on track. How quickly we decide to choose differently–coming back to the habits (big or small) that make us feel our best.